Dear Baby Girl (a letter from your Mum)

April 23, 2012

Bits and Pieces, For Mum, Parenting

Today at work I compiled a bunch of resources to create a program of sessions designed to develop a young person’s self-esteem. The irony wasn’t lost on me at all.

Now I am all grown up (yes, I do know that some people may snigger at this!) I believe I possess a self-esteem which is healthy enough to cope with the many tos and fros of life. Although my confidence takes a bit of a battering on occasions (doesn’t everyone’s???) bouncing back is not too hard and really I feel that I can honestly say that my ego and I are in a happy place.

Not always the case though. As a teen I was quite reserved, lacked confidence and didn’t have a high sense of self worth, just as I imagined that the popular and pretty girls did have these attributes, and in spades. I’ve since found out that some things are not always as they appear but, sadly, at the time a reasonable amount of energy was devoted to feelings of angst and wannabe-ism. I wasn’t bullied or teased or anything sinister like that, but looking back I can’t remember a time in my high school life where I felt proud to be me. Sad when you stop to think about it.

One of the activities in the program I was working on today is to have the participant write a letter about self-esteem to a child they most likely will one day have. Me though, I’ve decided to pen a note to Baby Girl for her to read in her teenage hood time ……

Dear Baby Girl

Hello my darling, this is your mumma just wanting to give you some advice as you enter the tumultuous teen years. Please don’t roll your eyes sweetheart, I’m just trying to help.

Although I grew up in quite a different era, and although you may not be able to even imagine me as being younger than a fossil, I have lived through what you are possibly experiencing and I just want to share some thoughts with you.

Read this, my message to you, whenever you are experiencing hard times and I truly hope it may help you.

  • Baby girl, you ARE smart and you ARE clever. You may not be as smart or as clever as some, but you will find that you are smarter and cleverer than so many others, and that’s ok. We all fit along that line somewhere, so be happy in your spot.
  • Love what you see in the mirror. Look after your physical and emotional self and be kind to that gorgeous reflection of yours.
  • Speak kindly to others – even if you are cross or hurt or if it seems almost too hard. Being pleasant to others, even when it sucks, is great for your soul.
  • Smile often and genuinely. A smile on your dial makes you look confident and assured even if your heart is thumping, or breaking, or in your throat. A smile can be the best disguise ever!
  • Things are not always what they seem. Nor are people. I am so sorry to break this to you, darling. As you get older and wiser (just like your Mum) your instinct will help with this …. so please don’t panic yet.
  • The universe has a wonderful way of helping things fall into place. When things appear to go wrong, take a deep breath, visualize how they would be if right, and wait for better times to come. They will.
  • You don’t have to win every battle to win the war. There are some battles where it is more than ok to concede, just stay true to you.
  • Concentrate on making the best decisions for you. Let others make theirs. Always be willing to take responsibility for what you choose to do. Accept the celebration of a great decision or own the consequence of a poor one. 
  • What others think of you or say about you is their karma and not yours. You can only control what thoughts you have, what actions you take and what words come from your lips. For good karma make those thoughts, actions and words nice ones.
  • Always accept heartfelt apologies if they are given to you. Put past hurts in a sealed little box up high out of the way, don’t carry them in your pocket.

So there you have it sweet Baby Girl, an approach to life that I wish I had at your age. Take and use what you can of it, remember the rest for other times and be happy being you.

You are loved very much, now and always.
Mum xxx





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One Response to “Dear Baby Girl (a letter from your Mum)”

  1. Sis Says:

    Sis….that is just so so beautiful and well written! I am certain she will treasure those words, even on the days when she ‘hates’ you (like all good teenage girls do!!!). I know I’d have held a letter like that dear to me. I might ‘borrow’ this idea and some of the points if that’s ok? X


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